This non-electric bidet attachment is designed to retrofit existing two-piece toilets without altering plumbing or wiring. It provides two spray modes, rear wash and feminine wash, with a simple twist of a knob to adjust the spray from soft to strong. A self-cleaning rinse follows each use, and the nozzle retracts behind a guard gate to protect against splashback and keep the nozzle clean for the next use. The device is ultra-thin, about 0.24 inches, and shaped to sit flush with standard toilet bowls, leaving no gaps after installation. It is compatible with two-piece toilets and is designed to function with minimal disruption to regular bathroom routines. No electricity is required, and installation relies on the existing seat and standard mounting holes adjustable from 3.74 to 8 inches apart, making a secure fit possible for a variety of models. The construction uses durable ABS material with stainless steel components, including a braided hose, ceramic-core valves, and a stainless steel T-valve, all designed to resist corrosion and wear. Basic hardware and clear instructions accompany the unit, helping users complete the setup with common tools in a short amount of time. Once installed, the unit can be cleaned with routine bathroom cleaners, and the retractable nozzle reduces splash and keeps the seating area tidy.