A non-electric bidet attachment for toilets provides two cleaning modes, rear wash and feminine wash, accessible by twisting a knob to adjust water pressure from soft to strong. The device uses a self-cleaning cycle to rinse the nozzles with fresh water, and the nozzle retracts behind a guard gate after each use to shield against splashback. The unit is ultra-thin, measuring 0.24 inches in thickness, and is designed to fit most two-piece standard toilets with a nozzle concave downward profile to minimize gaps when installed. It does not require electricity or plumbing work, and includes installation instructions and hardware for a quick setup on a standard toilet. The mounting holes adjust from 3.74 to 8 inches to accommodate different bowls, and the valve connections use stainless steel components for corrosion resistance. Constructed from durable ABS material with a stainless steel braided hose and ceramic core valves, the assembly is designed for a long service life and easy maintenance. The design emphasizes reliability and simple care, with all metal parts and seals arranged to minimize leaks and reduce buildup. Regular cleaning with mild soap is compatible with the unit, and parts are accessible for occasional maintenance without special tools.